Sister Sanctified

This is a classic jazz track by Stanley Turrentine, from his 1972 album, Cherry. Hip hop fans might recognize it, as it’s been sampled by artists including 3rd Bass, Grandmaster Caz, Ice Cube, and most notably by KRS-One on the landmark My Philosophy, which I’ll post tomorrow.

If the embedded audio player doesn’t load, click to listen to
Sister Sanctified by Stanley Turrentine at Grooveshark.

Dancing With Myself

I debated throwing up another Billy Idol song, since it’s only been three weeks since I put one up. This is a classic of the masturbation music sub genre, yet it’s been covered by kids’ shows ranging from Kids Incorporated to Glee, as well as myriad other artists. The video embedded below, directed by Tobe Hooper, also seems to be primary visual influence for the television series, Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

If the embedded video doesn’t load, click to watch
Billy Idol – Dancing With Myself at YouTube.


Here’s a masturbation song that I’m sure you’ll agree is suitable for Sunday. It’s from Tori Amos‘ second album, Under The Pink, which is not only a great album musically, but was great for hooking up with women around 20 years ago. On a personal note, I actually hadn’t heard this song in years because I’m pretty sure my CD was stolen by this racist chick I was banging around 10 years ago, but I can’t be sure, because it also could have been this wannabe starlet that I never got to bang. The point is, one day the CD didn’t turn up, and I have no idea what actually happened to it. For I all know, underpants gnomes transported it to the eighth dimension.

Anyway, the video embedded below is from The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (of all places). I’m sure a large percentage of the folks watching thought she was singing about banging Jesus. By the way, I wish I could find an HD clip of this, because she looks stunning, but I don’t think they were shooting The Tonight Show in HD back in 1994.

If the embedded video doesn’t load, click to watch
Tori Amos “Icicle” (1994) at YouTube.

I Touch Myself

I was going to dedicate this one to someone, but wasn’t sure it would be appropriate. I don’t really know her; she’s someone I run into in the neighborhood once in a while and have small talk with. Nothing very deep or probing. For example, the other day I found out what her mother’s favorite ice cream is and when reflecting back on the conversation later, I realized I don’t know what her favorite ice cream is. So I figure, for once, maybe I should err on the side of discretion. Ain’t that a shock?

You know, now that I think about it, it’s probably never a good idea to dedicate a masturbation song to someone. Could you imagine the end of American Graffiti? Wolfman Jack goes on the radio, all, “Yowza! Yowza! This is The Wolfman howling’ at you!! Can you hear me?!? AAAOOOHHH!! Suzanne Somers, I’m howlin’ at ya with a dedication from Richard Dreyfuss who says that even though he doesn’t know you very well, he often thinks about ya when he’s doin’ the five knuckle shuffle — and eatin’ your mama’s favorite ice cream! Can you dig it?!?

Yeah. So much for discretion.

Every once in a while I get in an argument with someone about who performed this song. For some reason, people seem to think Blondie did it, but it’s by The Divinyls, and yes, Lucy Lawless has done a cover of it as well. The song has an unusual structure; most songs go VERSE/REFRAIN/VERSE/REFRAIN/BRIDGE/REFRAIN/VERSE/REFRAIN. I Touch Myself goes into the bridge very early, leading into the second verse. Despite this, it has a strong hook and an immediately catchy melody. The lyrics have a double entendre motif; one can look past the obviously sexual connotation to a deeper meaning, that of a great romantic or spiritual longing, which comes through in Christina Amphlett‘s singing.

If the embedded video doesn’t load, click to watch
Divinyls – I Touch Myself at YouTube.

Excuses, Excuses

If you’ve only recently discovered my blog, I hope whatever you found was worth the read. If you actually started following me, thank you so much for your patronage. Some of you have blogs or other online destinations that I will check out in kind when I have some time. If you’ve been reading Insomniac Non Sequitur for a while and want to know where the hell is all the stuff I promised months ago, I got caught up with other stuff. It’s still coming up. Also, WordPress changed the way they handle flash embeds, a lot of the videos on my older posts no longer show up. I knew this was going to happen, which is why I put off migrating my archives a while back (you may notice the gaps in post dates). Anyway, as you can see from my more recent posts in June and July, I was able to sort that out. The only thing is that I now have to put aside time to go through the older posts and replace any broken embeds. You, dear reader, may be able to help in that endeavor. If, while looking at a another post here, you come across a missing or broken embed, leave a comment on that page; that way, I’ll be sure to get on it. Naturally, you’re welcome to comment on anything you want, so do so if you feel moved. In the meantime:

  • I’m still working on that Police Academy piece.
  • I’ve been actively playing with the social video apps, but they keep getting updated. Still on top of it (which is kind of useless to you right now).
  • Going to post an entry on my recent L.A. trip in the next day or two.

Thanks for your patience!

She Bop

Continuing with the masturbation theme, I had this Cyndi Lauper song in mind because she was on WWE Raw a few weeks back with Wendi Richter presenting The One Man Southern Rock Band (that’s an actual wrestler, I’m not making that shit up) with a gold record, basically for being a jerk off. I was going to embed the original video for the song, and point out that Wendi Richter is the waitress with the big earrings, you can spot Captain Lou Albano in rollers, and the guy that plays the biker/love interest is Dave Wolff, who was Lauper’s producer at the time, but I can’t find jack shit about him on the internet, except this old clip of Roddy Piper power slamming him after presenting Captain Lou with a gold record and kicking Cyndi in the face (which is the scenario Lauper’s recent WWE appearance was referencing). Continue reading