This Preview is Definitely NOT Approved by the MPAA

"Yabba dabba doo!"

Rambo is no fucking joke. For real. I had to watch this trailer three times to make sure it wasn’t some kind of fan mash up. In any case, this is the most outrageous shit since Escape 2000. John Rambo 4 should be subtitled Leatherface Is A Bitch. The first half of the trailer is typical Stallone: hunting fish with an archery set while mumbling something about “not my business” and “not change anything.” At the midway point, the growth hormone kicks in and it is all about tearing people UP!! Literally. Watch this preview if you can stand it, but be warned: the tagline for John Rambo 4 for should be “The first one he decapitates. The second one he OBLITERATES. . .”

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I want to see Rambo fight Michael Myers next. Watch the trailer for the new Halloween now and tell me you wouldn’t pay good money to see that shit.

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I’m going to have nightmares if I ever get to sleep. All I know is Die Hard 4 better not be a PG-13.